hehe.. finally i am back from my aunt's place... my dear must have missed me alot from his blogs... it seems tat he had enjoyed life while i was away =P i have stayed over her place for the past few days with slow connection thus did not blog anything. but it was a stay which had involved lots of my inner feelings and thoughts... i had not spend much time with my aunt and uncle for the past whole year.. felt guilty as they dote on me alot as though i am their own child. on christmas day, i was over at my uncle's mum place for house warming... it was so crowded and all the children had grown up.. there were even some addition of young children.. how time flies. but as the children grow up, the adults are not getting any younger.. i saw my uncle sitting there quietly and listening to their conversation. suddenly.. i had the urge to cry, feeling that he had indeed grown older with all the lines on his face but his heart was still the same.. he loves me as much though i did not spend time with them... i felt like apologising to them for my wrongs.. i decided to accompany them for days as they missed me alot too...
over the few days, i did not really do anything much as they were busy- my aunt was busy with her tuition kids while my uncle worked.. i had to find things to keep myself occupied... it was only in the night when we had chance to spend time together.. we would chat about our lives and the future...
they had gone thru alot... my aunt had to tolerate with her injured hand and continue to work for a living.. my uncle had a big sore at the back of his feet and seeing him limping out of the room made me feels so sad.. they were catching up on age... i wondered how much more time do they have with us.. i am so afraid of losing them... like i lost my grandma few yrs back... all i can do now is to accompany them more often and massage all their pains away..
today i had a gathering with my relatives.. we ate at a restaurant in chinatown.. all of us chatted and joked happily.. after the dinner, we decided to head back home.. before we separate.. i decided to thank my third aunt for all the things she had done for my family during this crucial period of time.. my famiyl went thru a rough patch all these yrs and this year was the worst... she was all along there.. supporting us emotionally and financially... i wanted to thank her from the bottom of my heart... as i approach her.. i thanked her for all her help but she said all that was nothing.. suddenly i thought: how could all these things be nothing when she had done so much for my family.. i just hugged her and cried... i couldn't say anything else to thank her so much.. she just patted me on my head and said nothing... as i turned ard, i saw my aunt's eyes turned red.. i just did not have the chance to really thank everyone in my family for their help... but i hope they know..
on my way back to the mrt.. tears was rolling down my cheek as i recalled the past years.. times was really tough as i had to cope with all the problems and responsibilities.. from family, friends, relations and personal problems.. the whole world seems to be crushing down on me...sometimes i felt like giving up but whenever i think of what they have done for me n my family.. mine was nt compared to them... i just had to hold up my courage and walked on in life... i seem to be a wandering soul.. wandering all the way back home.. thinking about the past.. i just hope things will get better for the new year.. sad to say.. i could not hold my tears and broke down in my room... i felt better and had to get a hold of myself to get things done... i guessed all these obstacles have made me a stronger gal over the yrs.. i want to ensure that my family would have a better life when they gets older... as i am willing to take on the responsibility for life- for my aunties and uncles who have cared so much for me and always been there for me..
last of all.. happy anniversary dear.. loveya always..
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